Have Faith

Still in a bit of shock of the news of my just turned 5 year old needing surgery. I can see the hernia hiding inside and how tough is it to tell your overly active  5 year old boy to take it easy. Best of luck on getting that to happen. The appt is set for next Tuesday.  So things looking down-dealing with this, dealing with the anniversary of my dad's death and sick of living pay check to pay check. Finally a glimmer of hope-the streamline financing loan looks promising and will help to save $125/mo and lower 1% interest. I know for some people, they think not a big deal. When you live check to check, this is an awesome thing. I really believe in positive thinking. I know that I can't help but have my son's health problems in teh back of my little head and it consumes me right now, but this was a pleasant distraction. Even if it was for a short pause. Lesson to learn-keep looking and holding out for hope-things will get better and you'll make it through. Just see.

Another Life lesson-healthy kids-don't take this for granted

After a visit to the ER last night with my five year old son, and a couple hours later, he was diagnosed with an abdominal hernia. He's 5...really? Yes-not common, but can happen. I was so excited when baby number 3 came along and we got through the first year of life and no surgeries-wow. My first two babies both had surgeries as infants-fluke things-just like this. Now my always healthy 5 year old has been referred to pediatric surgery to fix it. The thought of handing over my son to a complete stranger-the anthestisioligist (now sure I spelled that correctly-blame it on lack of sleep) makes me nervous. I know it's a surgery that has been done before, but it's hard to not feel a bit worry on the thought of your child's life in someone else's hands. I never took for granted when my children are healthy. Having dealt with surgeris with my first two sons, a brain infection, bronchitis, this is dealable I know. People don't ever stop to count their blessings that they have healthy children until one becomes sick. Please learn this lesson now and not when you have to. Your children are precious. Enjoy time being spent with them and appreciate each day they give you a smile and happy to be healthy.

Another year, another day

Eight years gone, but not forgotten. RIP dad. It never fails. To this day, eight years later, I still struggle with this challenge-the toughest challenge in life. We all take life for granted. We don't stop to smell the roses or listen to the rain fall. We're consumed with work, families, getting kids to practice, housework, whatever. But when it's all gone and life is over, you'll look back and see the sad face of your five year old because you didn't take the time to play a game with him. The laundry needed to get done that time. Does the laundry care if you put it off an hour or a day? I'm just as guilty as everyone else-another time, another day-sweetie-will get to it tomorrow. But what it tomorrow never comes? Don't live your life in regrets. Pay attention to your loved ones and put their needs first before housework. The work can wait, but the satisfying smile of a game cannot. It's been a tough weekend, this coming from a daddy's girl and knowing the day he died, my life would forever change. I've learned to smile and not worry about little things. I've learned to appreciate life-the good and the bad and make the best out of what I have. I owe it all to him-the positive attitude he gave me. I hope as he watches over me, that he'd be proud of who I've become and hopefully with his guidance, will continue to grow and give back all he gave me.

The struggles

To pause for a minute on complications from pregnancy and delivery and it does continue:-( I want to reflect for a minute of one of the hugest struggles anyone will ever face and unfortunately we all will have this challenge. That's losing a loved one. As a child, a neighbor lady once died. It was sad for that moment, but life continued. I lost my only grandpa I knew at age 6. Reflecting back, I only have memories of him being ill with an oxygen tube down his nose. I don't recall that changing my life much. I quickly overcame it not realizing the impact his death had on others. Now as an adult and having experienced the loss of my father, followed by my granmda less then a year later, and a year after that my last grandma. I didn't think it would ever stop. Then I remembered how I've heard bad things happen in three. I was reassured a little bit that maybe we'd get a break from funerals. Tomorrow-Saturday, April 17th marks my father's 8 year anniversary of his death. Even to this day, I struggle with the entire month of April-tears fill my eyes as I relive those last few days with him, watching him slip away. Once full of life and now just a few weeks into his 53rd year of life, it's cut short. Way too short. He's missed out on so much and we all have for losing him so young. Losing a loved one-child, parent, sibling, spouse, whatever is the biggest challenge I believe ever. So as you are all sitting there pausing for a moment on how difficult life is because it's raining or you have to pay in taxes, whatever it is, please take a moment to think about all of the sick fighting for their life and the families that are affected.

Transverse/ECV Procedure

For all of you pregnant soon-to-be or already experienced mommies, you do not ever want to hear that your baby is laying sideways in you (transverse). I read about it in the "What to Expect When Expecting" book (a total must have book for any pregnant women). I never really knew it would mean anything to me though. On my week 37 normal appointment, I learned just that.My baby was transverse. They confirm it with just a portable ultrasound. There was literally a booklet of information I had to read through to make an informative decision on what to do. I could do nothing and hope the baby will turn on it's own, I could have a procedure called ECV (External Cephalic Version), I could just schedule a planned C-section at 39 weeks. What to do. This was my 4th baby and my last. All of my other babies were born naturally and without any complications. Please don't ever take that for granted. I didn't really want to have to experience a C-section if I didn't have to so do I go for the ECV or do I wait it out and hope the baby moves. My very experienced mid-wife told me that I was almost 38 weeks now and the likelihood of the baby moving on it's own is pretty unlikely considering the baby has been in that position most of it's time. Also, the longer I wait to make a decision, the worse my chances become of it being successful. The baby gets bigger and less amniotic fluid so pushing the baby into the correct position is more difficult. Right now, they gave me at 75% success rate. You'd think that's good and go for it, but read the fine print on the possible side effects. Small percents for all between 1-5% but the risks can be so severe-to the point of causing death to the baby. Is it worth it? If you're faced with this kind of decision, read all of the information out there, meet with the OB doctor that will perform it, ask them their success rate, how many or what type of complications have they experienced. If you do make the decision to do this, look at what they'll do if it's succesful. There is the possibility that if the procedure works, baby could turn back into the transverse position again. Can they induce right after the procedure? This procedure is done in labor and delivery units by experienced OB doctors. They do monitor both mom and baby before and after the procedure. I had a tough decision to make. My husband was leaning towards having it as the side effects of a major surgery he thought were worse then the small percent of the procedure. What a tough decision.

Is there an end to labor?

Having babies is a huge eventful life and you really never know how lucky you are when you're holding your beautiful bundle of joy. What kind of miracle is it that you've created this beautiful little being and how miraculous is it when they enter the world. A new mom and dad should never take for granted the miracle of life. It's really easy to. I had three beautiful boys before conceiving baby number four. The pregnancy was full of ups and downs really testing my faith and knowing everything will be fine. Now in labor, not feeling it much with the epidural, awaiting to know what am I having. Deep down it didn't matter though. The few hours of labor day that started at 3pm on Labor Day soon went into the early evening, late evening, the next morning. Where is my baby? Not ready to join us yet. This experience of nearly 20 hours of labor is one I'll never forget. A life lesson was learned that day. Please don't ever take for granted a healthy baby and uneventful delivery you have. Sadly, I did on my first three. The pregnancies were uneventful-a little weight gain with some cravings, morning sickness, but overall, a great experience. Baby four brought the experience of weight gain, to getational diabetes, to weight loss, to misdiagnosis of gestational diabetes, to elevated blood pressure, and now a baby that has been lying transverse the entire time. I was so proud that I overcame all of the ups and downs this pregnancy had that I wasn't prepared for what other curves and bumps life just handed me. Not many people know how truly blessed I am to have a beautiful baby and how many people it took to see that it turned out that way. It still brings tears to my eyes as I relive those 4 days in the hospital.